Sadie's Story ~ Part 3

When I think about my children I always have an image of them smiling. Happy. Care free. It makes me overjoyed to think of them that way. I wouldn't want to remember them any other way. It hurts me when they are in pain or upset. Seeing Sadie almost broke me. Literally broke me. While we were waiting to see Sadie we made a few calls to family and friends to update them on her status. I remember calling my best friend Ashlei who was updating everyone else at home. I sat down and dialed her number. When she answered I told her that she needed to sit down. I explained what they had found in Sadie's surgery and that she was in PICU. We didn't know what was going to happen and things would be touch and go for a little while. We cried. I think that's when it really hit me just how much my little girl had gone through and how much fighting she still had left to do. Ashlei said that she would pass on the news and ask for more prayers. Prayers is exactly what we needed to get through this. God is good. He provided.

At 8 o'clock Craig and I were allowed to go back and see Sadie in the PICU (Pediatric Intensive Care Unit). We tried to prepare ourselves. I'm not sure how you can do something like that. When we walked in her room I cried. I tried not too, really I did. But there she was laying in a hospital crib hooked up to tubes, cords and all kinds of different monitors. Unable to breathe on her own. Still in a high critical state. I remember thinking to myself how good her color looked. She wasn't as pale as I thought she would be. She had nurses and doctors all around her. They wouldn't leave her side. I was amazed at the care she received. Craig and I kissed her little forehead and stroked her hair. The nurses told us that she could hear our voices. We talked to her and told her how much we loved her and that she was going to be okay. We took turns being with her so mom & dad could see her before visiting hours were over.

That Wednesday night was long. We were allowed to stay in her room. Craig & I didn't sleep at all. Doctors and nurses were in Sadie's room constantly. Monitor alarams would go off every now and then. When they would we would jump. Panic. We had an awesome nurse though. Ashley was her name. She was a very caring and compasionate person. She explained everything to us as we went along. Every now and then Sadie would wake up from her sedation. When she did she would look at us with panic in her eyes and try to lift her arms. But they had her arms tied down to the bed so she wouldn't wake up and pull her tubes out. The nurses would give her a shot of medicine in her IV to knock her back out. This happened about every hour. It was heart wrenching. We couldn't do anything to help her except pray. We did a lot of that. Prayer is what saved us.

Thursday was better. Her chest x-ray confirmed that her lung was healing well. Her heart rate and oxygen levels were beginning to stablize. The prayers were working. Dr. Ostlie, her surgeon, said that they were going to start weaning her off of the ventilator on Friday. We were excited. Getting her off of that machine meant that she would be able to be moved to a regular room soon. I couldn't wait to hear her cry again. I missed it. That afternoon they took some blood to test her hemoglobin levels and white blood cells. Her hemoglobin came back too low. A minor set back. She would now require a blood transfusion. We had come all this way without needing one. I was upset. She was doing so well, and now this. The transfusion took about an hour. I was amazed at the difference. All of her stats came up and they started to turn down the ventilator.

Friday was a great day. Around 11 a.m. they pulled her ventilator tube and got rid of her sedation medicine. Her little cry was so weak. We were able to start holding her. I was so nervous to pick her up. She still had 3 IVs and 6 incisions. We could only hold her a certain way. I will never forget when the nurse handed Sadie to me. He set her on my lap and we rocked. She put her little cheek on my chest and cuddled up as close as she could get to me. I wrapped my arms around her and rocked her while I (of course) cried. These were tears of joy. I felt like I could finally comfort her and help her. Something I wasn't able to do over the last few days. Craig was still too nervous to hold her. He played camera man and read books to her. When I would sing songs she would calm down and fall asleep. I didn't want to let her go. I wanted to stay right there in that one calm peaceful moment. I could feel God telling me that it was going to be okay. Mom & Dad had a chance to hold her later during that day. Things were really looking up. Later that night around 9 we were moved to our own room, right across from the surgical clinic. We could breathe. She was out of the woods and we were going to be okay. It was going to be okay. To Be Continued...